BY JAN HAAG
STEADY DRIZZLE
4-28-97
O Devayani, what is important today?
The forces in the universe
conspire to give you
rain
and sunshine,
wind and the clouds,
a warm bed, and a good night's rest,
a place to communicate in cyberspace,
things to learn, images that
implode before exploding the mind -- for
which
you are grateful --
as you are grateful
for the birds and blossoms of spring.
O Devanyani, you, who consider yourself
one of the most fortunate of
women, want to insist on a
list
citing God
for all those
things
He has not given you. What things?
What list of wants and wishes?
O Devayani, those desires that walk
with you through
life?
Like most others'
wishes, they include
fame
and fortune -- much more than you ever needed.
For you have never wanted. You have never been
without fortune enough
to eat and to sleep
you
have had
enough fame to know that
it is folded away each day with yesterday's newspaper.
Still, O Devayani, you have wanted safety for your creations,
a
treasuring that comes only with
fame.
Fortune
doesn't hurt
either -- Fame and Fortune --
a safety net to assure the lasting of
your work.
Yet, as you are interested in archaeology, you see
that empires pass
away. Why shouldn't
your
writing, your
speculations about the
meaning
of it all, the pain and the bliss. Why
shouldn't it, too, crumble and be lost in the earth's
endless
re-cycling. O Devayani, you recognize
death,
even welcome
it.
And yet you don't want
your 10,000,000 stitches to disappear
because you made them for God, you made them in silence,
love and
meditation,
dedication,
sweet contemplation,
for their
beauty,
but mostly for gentle occupation.
They have served their purpose
moment by moment, like the
rain,
and the sun
and the autumn leaves falling
to nourish your next
moment and your next.
A steady drizzle of quiet moments, like the mist coming down
from the
spring sky, or the winter cold.
"Lasting"
was invented by
humans and imposed upon the earth to its detriment.
O Devayani, you know that better than anyone. You know
millions of
cells are programed
for death.
Your fame and your
fortune are
among those death driven
cells. Stay away from them. Remember what
Krishna said.
Ours is to do the work,
not to worry about the
fruits.
Don't spend five more minutes of a lifetime
worrying about
the meager drizzle of a fortune or fame
that never were an option. Do
your stitching, write your verse, let it
seek its own course in time
where even the universe will pass away. Everything
dies to change into
the next thing and the next. Would you hang back with the cells
programed for death?
Revised 4-28-2000
Copyright © 2000 Jan Haag
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
Jan Haag may be reached via e-mail:
jhaag@u.washington.edu
BY JAN HAAG